Troubled

It is end of the year... 2009 hasn't been good... compared to the previous few years... My feelings have been swinging more and felt unsettled... Maybe as I aged, I tend to think even more... I am trying to get rid of this bad character... but i just find it hard... But I will, and I have to...

Today, something ridiculous happened to me in the office... it is a sequel to yesterday's episode... From no where, a 'ba po' came to accuse me of something I have not done... Why did I ask the staff to come when the system is down. They have wasted their time here... When on earth did I ask pple to come? Why can't they get their facts right before accusing others. Does it mean when they are loud, they are right? When I ask the ba po to check with the PIC, she exclaimed that I was not responsible?? After verifying with the PIC and her own staff, she dare not make noise as they are equally liable... The real cause is the PIC... He is such a Yes man... Infront of the ba po, he is so soft spoken... But today, when he came and asked me to do something so unstructuredly, I ask him for alternative... He keeps finding excuses and storms away...

Do I look like someone who can be bullied? Or do they just want to find a chu qi tong? I can only blame myself to take up this role... No direction, messy project, lousy working style, then change in direction... I really dun think i am suitable to stay in this place anymore... Even though there is some light some where, but i do not know if the pull factor is there? Or should I believe everything happens for a reason????